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Jollintine's Trax

by Jollimus

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1.
A'ight y'all, I know like, Valentine's Day is almost over. Singles Awareness day or whatever the hell you wanna call it But, this song needed to be made And I just want to share it with you, a'ight Yo Roses are colorful, Violets are too Happy Valentines Day, I send my love to you Whether you're single, dating or some kind of married This is one holiday that's universally scary Whether you're awkward as hell with everybody you know Or at your best with a crowd like Nelson Lugo Even if you're just a dick like musicnerdanimals Love burns so hot that my heart could light candles No hate shown, no surprise blown Pressin B to Jump and claim love's home For you, luv, I'd abdicate the top spot Wanna give a hoof-bump to Lady Klocksentrot No one rocks it raw like the Illest of Gills Just like no one loves eatin like the Fridgest of Bills Found a gift for PovertyMan: A shiny gold pan And I whippoored in the wind just for you Old Man I love you all, Happy Valentines Day JolliLungsYou is well on its way Oh, it's coming and there's no way to stop it So just come here and get some dark chocolate I love you all, almost as much as Old Bay Cuz I Old Bay Err'thang, but y'all are ok I'll be your plug if you be my socket Come over here and get some dark chocolate How can I convince you that I'm a real keeper? Lay bars on your ears like a better poetic teacher? Shower you with warmth like a good space heater? Do lines off your ass as if I was beaker? How about I just be Jolli? That should be enough Don't like the way I love? Tough. I love StarF, the way he raps, and Mailbox And I gotta give Big Damn Heroes mad props Even if Tyler's in love with the Golden Girls And mcBrew loves pizza more than he loves the world 1-Up, I'm gonna finally use that beat you gave me Flood the chomp rock caves with a voice like gravy Gonna win the Black Man Voice-Off against Ohm-I Get the treats from TYT, and an apple pie What, I love Pie. Shut up. And I'll finally get sh0e that KFC Cup Praise the Lampedgod, it's Valentines Day Gonna shoot for the moon, and fly away Spreadin Jolli-style love all over from my rocket Just sayin, c'mere and get some dark chocolate Dynamo Dash called me a Champion Cuz I got mad rhymes like a Stampion I keep my love for Wisconsin in my left pocket Come on over, y'all need to get some dark chocolate I love you Mom, hope you're doin just fine I love you Toast, for at Science, you shine I love you Milt, you're my brother in Prime I love you Dad, though we've not talked in some time I love you Raslin, you're the hottest girl in nerdcore I love you Wreckshin, you've the greatest beard in birdcore I love you Favorite Husband and Favorite Wife Klopfenpop, look, I'm rhymin wife with life and strife Number3, tell ya sis she needs to holla And tell her I'd never ever fail to call her I love you Watts, Stiborge, AlphaRiff and Yuki Bea B, Mags, Minnie, Mary, Stella, and Lucy Quartz Relic, Tye Fighter and Lo Tech, What of it RPG-Unit, Bill Beats, and C0splay, you muppet Rulebook, Clifford, and all of SCR, present and past Josh Crow, Trista, Abby, and White Girl Ass Holy Hera, Batman, it's Valentines Day So I'm sharing love in a Jolli-ful way I love the Emerald Empire, and all those adjacent Those who want more than nerdcore, and all those complacent All my friends out there who are pounding pavement Lady V, and Nova, and all y'all in the basement There's not enough room for us all to play Bop-It So bring yourself over here and get some dark chocolate Oh my God, Schaffer, I just think you're the hottest Every time I see you, you're workin it, you got it And Rachel Fishel, I love you, don't you ever doubt it And whoremoans, I'm your biggest fan, not afraid to shout it Philly, I love you, but stop talkin bout shit And niik's girlfriend, Hi, I'm Jollimus. If I missed you, don't worry, I still love you man Beaker, share this with Dan. I love you Dan!
2.
L.I.O.N 02:44
Alright, so, my Valentine's Day track is like, really late this year. I should prolly start earlier next time. Let's go back to the 14th of February, things are lookin kinda scary People beatin' down doors for a last minute confectionary Will I join the fun? Hell, I don't know Single on this day twenty eight years in a row I don't appreciate it. It really ain't a good feelin And I'm workin hard to get this hole in me healin Pain leaves me reelin'. And I wish it would stop But it enver ends, whether I like it or not Single livin? I'll just say I ain't a fan See, this year, I got me a plan Get some nice clothes, take a hot shower Grab some Dark Chocolate and flowers Then I'm gonna go find me a white girl Tell her things to make her live in my world And once she's there, will she leave? No, enver ever And she'll love me forever Girl, don't be like that, I just want you to love me Give the right gifts, so you'll hold no one above me Rain or shine, I'll always be there for you honey I might be short on moneydollars, but I'm very loving I'm tha Jekyll, don't make me show you my Hyde Cuz if ya hide, ain't no one gonna be happy tonight Don't even care if you don't think that I'm hot Cuz you're my valentine, girl, whether you like it or not Step outside to start my search and the weather's bitter Whose idea was it to put this day in the middle of winter? Grab a coat, find a scarf, don a hat and gloves On a quest to find my unfound love Search bars, hit the mall, scour tha stores Until I find the one that I simply adore Hit her over tha head with my trademark charm Keep up tha compliments, kill tha smarm She'll go out with me, cuz I'm extremely loveable And when I'm nice and clean, I'm supremely huggable And I'm a muggle yo, no wizardry here Not negging you girl, there's no need to fear I'm polite, sincere, courteous, and sane I won't play games just to find ya name I'll just say life ain't always what it seems Cuz you could say that of tha crop, I'm tha fuckin cream Girl, don't be like that, I just want you to love me Give the right gifts, so you'll hold no one above me Rain or shine, I'll always be there for you honey I might be short on moneydollars, but I'm very loving I'm tha Jekyll, don't make me show you my Hyde Cuz if ya hide, ain't no one gonna be happy tonight Don't even care if you don't think that I'm hot Cuz you're my valentine, girl, whether you like it or not You're a white girl, and you want you some Jollimus I'm Jollimus, and my love for you is bottomless It looms over you like an ominous obelisk Blows air in your eyes, like a testing optometrist If you bring hatred, my love will demolish it Think you can run, but it's the opposite Love knows no bounds, takes off like a shot Cuz you're my valentine, girl, whether you like it or not
3.
Our Love Is 04:39
Our love is a story girl, and you're tha main character When I outline perfection, you're my parameters You've a glorious laugh. You know how to sing And you speak positively when you're talkin bout me I could spend my whole life lost within your eyes And never try to force my way between your thighs Someone tells you they're tha greatest, well I know you're greater Cuz our love is a story girl, and I'm tha narrator Opening sequence: A starry winter night You turn left at tha gate as you get off a flight Collect your luggage, catch a cab, go to your hotel Take a bubble bath cuz you weren't feelin well Call me up talkin bout how you think I'm a creep Get yourself worked up, and then you fall asleep The next morning, you're greetin tha dawn Makin sure I'm not what your mind is on Wanderin thru my city, your excitement is bottomless Takin pictures of museums and the Washington Monument In your head, we're nothin but arguments But by lunch, you find yourself hollin @ Jollimus Was it accidental? Was it by design? Doesn't matter cuz you hit me up and we got time So c'mon girl, take another chance with me And we'll do what comes to us naturally Our love is a pizza girl, and you're the dough You provide stability, like a kitchen flo' Your beauty's tha sauce, our happiness is tha cheese So in this analogy, my aim is to please Baked to perfection inside heated stone Way too big for one person alone Delivered directly to our summer cottage Cuz our love is a pizza girl, and I am tha sausage See, you're tha dough, a foundation on which to build A task at which you'll find I'm impeccably skilled You're tha sauciest maiden, with beauty incomparable We fit together better than I thought was imaginable Pepperoni's our joy, onions are our sadness Anchovies are our long descent into madness And that's why we avoid them, plus, they're gross Bacon's what we like, but not love, the most Pineapple's all the fucks that we don't give And olives are the fights we have as we live Baked together so nobody can stop us Just lemme know that I'm still your favorite topping C'mon babe, you're the one that I knead I'll stuff ya crust girl, if you know what I mean Every date we have, people ask what time it is And I'm like "Don't you know? It's pizza time, bitches" Our love's Jurassic Park girl, and you're a raptor No doubt in your mind, I'm tha one you're after Huntin with ya pack, ya single me out No time for me to even get off a shout Drag me back to your place, cuz a winner is you And you light some candles, it's a dinner for two Afterwards, we have loud angry sex Cuz our love's Jurassic Park girl, and I'm T. Rex Millions of years ago, our kind ruled tha earth But neither of us had a natural birth Crafted in a lab, by a team of scientists And you know what, I ain't buying this Made for a zoo, ain't that some shit? Some stupid fat guy brought us bliss He destroyed the barriers keeping us apart And allowed me to eat my way into your heart I followed some lights, tried to snag a bouquet But they cut on tha jeep and drove away You ate tha token off screen, you made tha white people scream And jumped straight in my life looking like a dream In the end, we had a great big fight While those losers ran off into tha night But I still love you girl, you're tha best Cuz nothing beats loud angry dino sex Our love is tha navy girl, and you're a carrier You got hornets and tomcats, and a harrier With a battle group protecting you from enemies And a nuclear engine, no need to catch a breeze There's enough force here to do as we please So we project democracy across tha seven seas But if we go to war, we won't hide, even a bit Cuz our love is tha navy girl, and I'm a frigate Our love is an anime, you're the magical girl Sexy costume change and you're protecting tha world When you're working, I like to be a pest Sometimes we fight in public just for tha makeup sex You never defeat me, I just go home And you follow quick, so I'm never alone Even in tha fight scenes, I be chilling Cuz our love is an anime, and I'm tha villain
4.
Another Valentine's Day, another Valentine's song Proclaim my love for white girls, but don't get me wrong I ain't tryna be rude, I'm just tryna tell you That my inclination leans caucasian No need for hatin', I'm just sayin what's true And if you take offense, girl, we could be friends, I guess And I'll move on. But if you wanna see this through Then we gotta talk about your Valentine's gift Flowers are played out, that's my official decree And I'm the only Dark Chocolate you'll need And tho it may be shiny, I won't get you a ring Or other jewelry, tho it may be fit for a queen I'll take you out and get you a big slice Of the best pie you'll ever have in your life Yeah, I'm talkin' pizza, not apple or peach Won't leave you sittin' there askin' me why Pizza is life, comin' straight out tha oven Don't care what you say, no one and nothing above it If you disrespect pizza, there can be no us Never said I didn't love you, don't cause a fuss Pizza is love, even good when it's cold And I'll share mine with you even when we get old We like what we like, and in that, we're free But if you get pizza wit pineapple, don't share it wit me I once spoke of love in terms of tha pizza If I remember correctly, our happiness is the cheese And you're tha dough cuz you provide stability And above all else, you're the one that I knead And I'm tha sausage, or whatever's your favorite topping Unless it's pineapple or anchovies Damn, girl, don't put that on me Otherwise, my love might show signs of stopping I mean, you like what you like, and that's all right And me, I disappear into the night You look around and you can't see I'm right here But I'm filling you with love instead of fear Cuz you know that I'm tha Jolli Mean Giant I'm so loveable, there's no need to be frightened Get there at quarter of to pick you up at eight You're so beautiful, girl, I could never be late Pizza is life, comin' straight out tha oven Don't care what you say, no one and nothing above it If you disrespect pizza, there can be no us Never said I didn't love you, don't cause a fuss Pizza is love, even good when it's cold And I'll share mine with you even when we get old We like what we like, and in that, we're free But if you get pizza wit pineapple, don't share it wit me Roses are red, Violets are blue Pepperoni's great, and so are you Usin basic rhymes to get your attention Bein Jollimus so you'll stick around F'real, luv, I'm just tryna be the right man For you and me, I'll dress like I'm a white man I'll buy you what you want if I can afford it And I'll enver let you feel like I'm one to avoid Off no bullshit tho, about the pineapples I don't think they belong on pizza But if want 'em, that's your prerogative I won't eat that with you tho, cuz it's gross Please don't let that be what keeps us apart I'm tryna insinuate myself in your heart But if you want me to, I'll go away 'til another Valentine's song, another Valentine's Day Pizza is life, comin' straight out tha oven Don't care what you say, no one and nothing above it If you disrespect pizza, there can be no us Never said I didn't love you, don't cause a fuss Pizza is love, even good when it's cold And I'll share mine with you even when we get old We like what we like, and in that, we're free But if you get pizza wit pineapple, don't share it wit me
5.
Bourbon in my tea, while snow falls all around me I see you there white girl, your beauty is astoundin Heart poundin, plus my mind is racing Lookin forward to tha trial that I'll be facin Gotta find a way to introduce myself Without lookin like a stock nigga off tha shelf Maybe I'll start with a gentle smile Drop a hint I'll be here a while Chat you up whene'er I see you round Never follow you tho, I ain't stalkin you down I'm just talkin you round to tha Jollimus way If you let me love you, won't let you get away You won't be mine, I'll be yours, for all that entails Believe me girl, I'd follow dat ass ta hell You won't be fine, you'll be glorious, like Bobby Roode And you'll get everywhere with me with that attitude Bourbon in my tea, I can feel your love girl When you look at me, I know that you're my world Bourbon in my cup, I love makin you happy Lemme know wassup if this is gettin too sappy Bourbon in my girl, I know you feelin good Cuz you shoutin bout our love to the whole neighborhood Bourbon in my heart, but don't get me wrong Valentine's from the start in this bourbon song Vodka in my tea cuz I ran outta bourbon The love I give you girl, well, you deserve it I'll be that nigga you need and that nigga you want Cuz I'm that nigga you got and I ain't boutta front I might not make as many moneydollars as you But I make up for it just bein incredibly cool Rock steady too, insinuate myself in your heart Cuz, girl, you been holdin mine from tha start Like you was Mola Ram without the creepy ritual To think I wouldn't love you is hella risible My love is visible, like an aura that glows And every time I'm with you, it noticeably grows Only downside's in the night I don't disappear You look around and you can see I'm right here. I can't be mad, cuz it's worth your lovin Remember pizza is life, comin straight out tha oven Bourbon in my tea, I can feel your love girl When you look at me, I know that you're my world Bourbon in my cup, I love makin you happy Lemme know wassup if this is gettin too sappy Bourbon in my girl, I know you feelin good Cuz you shoutin bout our love to the whole neighborhood Bourbon in my heart, but don't get me wrong Valentine's from the start in this bourbon song I was gonna write a third verse, but I'm short on time So have some classic JolliValentine's rhymes I love you girl, almost as much as Old Bay Cuz I Old Bay Err'thang, but you're pretty ok I'll be your plug if you be my socket Come over here and get you some dark chocolate Don't even care if you don't think that I'm hot Cuz you're my valentine, girl, whether you like it or not Our love is an anime, you're the magical girl Sexy costume change and you're protecting tha world When you're working, I like to be a pest Sometimes we fight in public just for tha makeup sex You never defeat me, I just go home And you follow real quick, so I'm never alone Even in tha fight scenes, I be chilling Cuz our love is an anime, and I'm tha villain Bourbon in my tea, I can feel your love girl When you look at me, I know that you're my world Bourbon in my cup, I love makin you happy Lemme know wassup if this is gettin too sappy Bourbon in my girl, I know you feelin good Cuz you shoutin bout our love to the whole neighborhood Bourbon in my heart, but don't get me wrong Valentine's from the start in this bourbon song Bourbon in my tea, I can feel your love girl When you look at me, I know that you're my world Bourbon in my cup, I love makin you happy Lemme know wassup if this is gettin too sappy Bourbon in my girl, I know you feelin good Cuz you shoutin bout our love to the whole neighborhood Bourbon in my heart, but don't get me wrong Bourbon from the start in this Valentine's song

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released February 10, 2018

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Jollimus Washington, D.C.

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